Part I: Lists

 

Things that can be thrown:

 

voices

games

light buildings

spaghetti (to test doneness)

discus or shot-put

also javelin

a fit

a pie

stars

ideas

bouncing blue

spaghetti (dry)

rugs

pots

 

Ways to burn oneself:

 

gasoline and lighter

breathing very hot on the skin

sun-travel

carefully

with precision

think

cook

extend

carrying toasted foods across large spaces

play in the sand

check to see if the oven is on

smoke the roach

set the Olympic torch down on ones lap

meditate in a tanning booth

7th grade: ask the popular kid youve had a 2-year crush on to go with you

push the snooze button on the fire alarm

 

Things that are wet:

 

crying tarantulas

pier posts

bridle bits

water on the knee

crying bugs besides tarantulas

crying animals besides bugs

dreams, especially when about me

dragons

waterfalls

people today in Providence, esp. when on bicycles

Matt Oberts evening

 

This is not evil:

 

Northern witches

the upper parts of Hades

breaking the 11th commandment

enjoying a good litter

lighthearted gossip

S & M

the desire to smite

magic beans

to live backwards

Knievel

ignorance

absolute zero

sighs

 

Things that arent very tall:

 

three pennies

my mum

Americas morals

short buildings, small planets, water towers for very small villages

drinks of water

head lice

some tales

some tails

some cuts

some orders

some ardor

a headless cripple

a skyscraper for mitochondria

soft drinks and highballs

Keri Houlihan (49 )

a ducks knees

a tadpoles knees

a grasshoppers knees

other animals knees

 

Things not to do with a rhinoceros:

 

this should be obvious -- sex with the horn!

play Ping-Pong

give it sedatives before its bath

teach logic

play dice

admit ones faults

start a band

play Yahtzee

sex with no horn

charge

be rude to its mother

move a piano

play waiter

play doctor

tag

 

Things that are found in a shoebox:

 

dirty rubber band

tissue paper

cassettes

shoes that are about to get thrown away because new shoes got bought

things that had previously been lost in a shoebox

baseball cards

Dads ammo

Moms recipe for foot-flavored gingerbread men

smutty Victorian photographs

dust

scraps

cupcakes

shoes

 

 

 

 

 

 

V.E.R.B.A.T.I.M.

maraniss tobin hess kleinberg ebin guitart winard obert

february 23, 1998